Friday, October 17, 2014
Fixing a broken self
There was nothing to say the day you left. It was sudden and i felt it was coming. Further more, i had finally left my past behind to be with you but ended up, i was the fool. I'm tired, i told you. I'm scared even now. There can be no part of me that find rest yet i'm moving on with my life as a soulless person. Perhaps you, liked the many others i came across didn't understand and maybe there was nothing necessary for others to understand. I am just relieved that you're happy with someone else even though you said it wasn't because of him but it's okay, it's over.
Right from the start, i know i am broken beyond words. Everyday, i would think of dying and how to make good use of my death. I feel as lonely as ever which i told no one. I smiled and i cried. I just seem like any other person on the earth, yes i am. How was i able to give anyone happiness when i'm so reliance for someone there to reach out to me? I was cheated time after time, torn and tattered, i kept moving. Will there be a day when i can fix myself so that i would feel no pain, no suffering and no sadness? I look up at the evening sky and i thought, fate is rubbish and i... beyond anything was born to carry such fate. For all that i'm broken, i am myself. A hidden side of me which no one would ever know nor understand. Beyond fixing, beyond repair, i gently wish for the end to come.
Right from the start, i know i am broken beyond words. Everyday, i would think of dying and how to make good use of my death. I feel as lonely as ever which i told no one. I smiled and i cried. I just seem like any other person on the earth, yes i am. How was i able to give anyone happiness when i'm so reliance for someone there to reach out to me? I was cheated time after time, torn and tattered, i kept moving. Will there be a day when i can fix myself so that i would feel no pain, no suffering and no sadness? I look up at the evening sky and i thought, fate is rubbish and i... beyond anything was born to carry such fate. For all that i'm broken, i am myself. A hidden side of me which no one would ever know nor understand. Beyond fixing, beyond repair, i gently wish for the end to come.
i know that i have loved you ... at 5:14 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
