Sunday, August 31, 2014
The End
The end, it's such a scary place to be, everything has fall apart. In the end, there's no reason to pretend, i know you won't be back again. Maybe it's not over, till it's over, every ending is a new beginning, one more chance to get it right, one more chance to get it wrong. Sometimes nowhere leads to somewhere and we start to move on again, have you?
You're everywhere i see, even when i close my eyes i see and i'm never alone. Yesterday, i attended a wedding dinner at TG. Saw many of the long lost friends whom i've already lost contact with. To my surprised, many of them still remember me. It's been perhaps 10 years... I last went to TG was the fateful meeting with you. Miss panadol, don't fall sick again ok? Even when i was having the dinner, i recalled how the place was liked during the camp. I am not trying to forget but i try not to remember. Even when years past, i am sure you will always be somewhere inside me.
I wanted to say, there is a mixed feeling inside me. Happy for the bride and groom but i felt lost & lonely. Being alone in this world opened me up to a lot of possibilities. I fear marriage now. I fear getting into a relationship. There is this immense pressure which i simply cannot describe. I'm tired... Somehow i feel sad, always lonely and alone yet i'm enjoying it because it hurts me. After all this while, i could never be myself truly. I really hope you're leading a happier life without me.
Sometimes, to love is to let go. Perhaps the beautiful things in life are untouchable and things we missed. That's how we cherish them everyday, every moment inside us. I will always smile whenever i think of you even though their is a bitter feeling of sadness. As long as you're happy, that's all i wish for... The end, it comes in various form and it strikes you suddenly. Not every ending ends in misery but for me, these memories will always be kept inside me and when my end is near, i hope someday, you will be able to read my thoughts and feelings and smile because you know you once had someone that will smile for you and wanted to smile with you everyday.
The End....
You're everywhere i see, even when i close my eyes i see and i'm never alone. Yesterday, i attended a wedding dinner at TG. Saw many of the long lost friends whom i've already lost contact with. To my surprised, many of them still remember me. It's been perhaps 10 years... I last went to TG was the fateful meeting with you. Miss panadol, don't fall sick again ok? Even when i was having the dinner, i recalled how the place was liked during the camp. I am not trying to forget but i try not to remember. Even when years past, i am sure you will always be somewhere inside me.
I wanted to say, there is a mixed feeling inside me. Happy for the bride and groom but i felt lost & lonely. Being alone in this world opened me up to a lot of possibilities. I fear marriage now. I fear getting into a relationship. There is this immense pressure which i simply cannot describe. I'm tired... Somehow i feel sad, always lonely and alone yet i'm enjoying it because it hurts me. After all this while, i could never be myself truly. I really hope you're leading a happier life without me.
Sometimes, to love is to let go. Perhaps the beautiful things in life are untouchable and things we missed. That's how we cherish them everyday, every moment inside us. I will always smile whenever i think of you even though their is a bitter feeling of sadness. As long as you're happy, that's all i wish for... The end, it comes in various form and it strikes you suddenly. Not every ending ends in misery but for me, these memories will always be kept inside me and when my end is near, i hope someday, you will be able to read my thoughts and feelings and smile because you know you once had someone that will smile for you and wanted to smile with you everyday.
The End....
i know that i have loved you ... at 7:37 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
