Friday, May 25, 2012
The Ending
It's been a long 3 months. Perhaps it isn't as long as i thought it would be. Today marks an end to the course and it also marks an end to someone i cherished and is important to me. Someone i truly cared for with my heart. I'm happy that i know i've tried my best despite many misunderstandings and conflicts. I've always been trying my best to clear my doubts, ask questions and trying to improve myself. I always ask myself if i've done the right thing and my answer is always yes.
Perhaps how we perceive things are different, that give rise to conflicts and problems. I've always believe if we're able to make an effort to sit down and share our opinions and open up to new ideas and accept the fact that might really be how others might feel, things would be better off. Despite all these troubled times, we managed to pull through. When i was down, you cheered me up. You words have healing powers from god yet they cause destruction as well. When you're angry or sad, my company and patience pulls you through. We both agreed that there're 2 sides to a coin and we should try to look at things and acknowledge how others might feel. If there is a misunderstandings of words or tones, talk it out. Everything will be just fine.
A good friend of mine once shared with me everything. She did not hold back but i did. Afraid that my misery and sorrow would affect her or the people i care for. I guess i must've hurt her unknowingly. The greatest joy i find, being with her is that she's real. She wouldn't put up an act in front or being others. But her lack of patience to explain hurts me. Her judgmental ideals are far off. I'll take as much time as i can just to explain and tell her how i truly feel and what i truly meant. I know i tend to misunderstand her badly as well. That's why i always love to ask questions.
As i typed this post, the feeling of tomorrow wouldn't come overwhelmed me. I would always take an extra effort and go the extra mile for people i care for. I wouldn't complain even when i am tired because i do it willingly. As i close my eyes and start to feel sleepy, all i can think about is the happy moments, the smiles, the cute reactions, the sorrow that is now carve deep inside me now. Even as the day comes to an end, the night will be there. Life goes on with or without me or you. I will reflect on what you've said to me and hopefully, one day, we will be able to see eye to eye, face to face.
The end, is such a scary place to be, everything has fall apart, don't know how to get away from here. But i know every ending is a new beginning. One more chance to get it right, one more chance to get it wrong. I'm glad to have met people i can hold dearly to me in my life. I'm glad to have met many people, i'm glad to have met her. I would gladly trade my tomorrow for yesterday if it means just to care and see her again once more. An important friend, a pure soul, someone really special to me. Although i no longer have the chance nor courage to face her anymore because of all these mixed feelings, i still wish my phone would ring and we could make things clear. It's the 1st time i cried for someone other than my girlfriend. There is always a first time, and that's you.
I just want to say thank you for being there for me for the past months and i cherish each and every moment together be it happy or sad, angry or miserable. Thank you for not abandoning me even when you were unhappy. All the things you've done, the effort you've put in, i might not be able to feel them nor know them. Still, i know you've done your best, the best you know to make the journey a fruitful one. Even though i may no longer be around you anymore, even though we may no contact each other anymore, we both know we truly cared, cherished, liked and we meant a whole lot to each other. I would never trade away the memories we shared for anything.
Take care to my fellow course mates. Take care to that special friend whom makes me a whole lot better person and let me know the feeling of pursuing what i want. I will never forget you. I dedicate this post to my special friend, to the person i cherish. Hamster, this is for you. I'll be there always.
Perhaps how we perceive things are different, that give rise to conflicts and problems. I've always believe if we're able to make an effort to sit down and share our opinions and open up to new ideas and accept the fact that might really be how others might feel, things would be better off. Despite all these troubled times, we managed to pull through. When i was down, you cheered me up. You words have healing powers from god yet they cause destruction as well. When you're angry or sad, my company and patience pulls you through. We both agreed that there're 2 sides to a coin and we should try to look at things and acknowledge how others might feel. If there is a misunderstandings of words or tones, talk it out. Everything will be just fine.
A good friend of mine once shared with me everything. She did not hold back but i did. Afraid that my misery and sorrow would affect her or the people i care for. I guess i must've hurt her unknowingly. The greatest joy i find, being with her is that she's real. She wouldn't put up an act in front or being others. But her lack of patience to explain hurts me. Her judgmental ideals are far off. I'll take as much time as i can just to explain and tell her how i truly feel and what i truly meant. I know i tend to misunderstand her badly as well. That's why i always love to ask questions.
As i typed this post, the feeling of tomorrow wouldn't come overwhelmed me. I would always take an extra effort and go the extra mile for people i care for. I wouldn't complain even when i am tired because i do it willingly. As i close my eyes and start to feel sleepy, all i can think about is the happy moments, the smiles, the cute reactions, the sorrow that is now carve deep inside me now. Even as the day comes to an end, the night will be there. Life goes on with or without me or you. I will reflect on what you've said to me and hopefully, one day, we will be able to see eye to eye, face to face.
The end, is such a scary place to be, everything has fall apart, don't know how to get away from here. But i know every ending is a new beginning. One more chance to get it right, one more chance to get it wrong. I'm glad to have met people i can hold dearly to me in my life. I'm glad to have met many people, i'm glad to have met her. I would gladly trade my tomorrow for yesterday if it means just to care and see her again once more. An important friend, a pure soul, someone really special to me. Although i no longer have the chance nor courage to face her anymore because of all these mixed feelings, i still wish my phone would ring and we could make things clear. It's the 1st time i cried for someone other than my girlfriend. There is always a first time, and that's you.
I just want to say thank you for being there for me for the past months and i cherish each and every moment together be it happy or sad, angry or miserable. Thank you for not abandoning me even when you were unhappy. All the things you've done, the effort you've put in, i might not be able to feel them nor know them. Still, i know you've done your best, the best you know to make the journey a fruitful one. Even though i may no longer be around you anymore, even though we may no contact each other anymore, we both know we truly cared, cherished, liked and we meant a whole lot to each other. I would never trade away the memories we shared for anything.
Take care to my fellow course mates. Take care to that special friend whom makes me a whole lot better person and let me know the feeling of pursuing what i want. I will never forget you. I dedicate this post to my special friend, to the person i cherish. Hamster, this is for you. I'll be there always.
When I am walking in front of you
I am protecting you
When I am walking behind you
I am looking after you
When i am walking beside you
I am with you
And if you don't see me anywhere
I'll be in the heaven watching over you
With Love
Snoopy
i know that i have loved you ... at 9:12 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
