Wednesday, May 09, 2012
Cherish
How long has it been? Those cherished days, those happy memories and those treasure people. Why are they no longer around. The world is always changing and that goes the same for people who are constantly changing. Who is defined as important and who is defined as not important? Are road sweeper not important compared to a company's CEO? What is define as right and what is wrong? Social norms? Are these the guidelines?
Cherished? With the ED. I guess everything cherished is in the past or it's just in the memories. Never in the past did i felt cherished. Or perhaps i've forgotten how it feels like. What others might deemed easy seems difficult for me. I've always tell people that everyone is special and unique in their own way. I've always been reaching out to people and helping those i care for. I believe if i try my best, somehow i can save them from this endless cycle of sorrow. But it seems i can't do anything about saving myself. I'm tired. Tired of pretending i am happy, tired of pretending i am not suffering and tired of pretending that i should live on. Every little courage and hope is flickering. Is my faith not strong enough or is the cold wind too strong that frozen my heart in the process? I'm lost.
Cherish what we have now because we are not promised a tomorrow. I'm tired of holding people close. Cherishing, it ends up only in the memories of oneself and no other will ever understand. Right now, i'm just happy that time still moves on for people around me because for me, i've been stuck in that time which i can't put a stop to my feelings. I really wish i could stab myself countless time to inflict pain so i can move on. Time after time, i'm into the ecstasy of misery and sorrow and i can't resist it. I've tried too long to be strong. These tears, hopefully will ease everything in time.
I'm tired...
Cherished? With the ED. I guess everything cherished is in the past or it's just in the memories. Never in the past did i felt cherished. Or perhaps i've forgotten how it feels like. What others might deemed easy seems difficult for me. I've always tell people that everyone is special and unique in their own way. I've always been reaching out to people and helping those i care for. I believe if i try my best, somehow i can save them from this endless cycle of sorrow. But it seems i can't do anything about saving myself. I'm tired. Tired of pretending i am happy, tired of pretending i am not suffering and tired of pretending that i should live on. Every little courage and hope is flickering. Is my faith not strong enough or is the cold wind too strong that frozen my heart in the process? I'm lost.
Cherish what we have now because we are not promised a tomorrow. I'm tired of holding people close. Cherishing, it ends up only in the memories of oneself and no other will ever understand. Right now, i'm just happy that time still moves on for people around me because for me, i've been stuck in that time which i can't put a stop to my feelings. I really wish i could stab myself countless time to inflict pain so i can move on. Time after time, i'm into the ecstasy of misery and sorrow and i can't resist it. I've tried too long to be strong. These tears, hopefully will ease everything in time.
I'm tired...
i know that i have loved you ... at 10:56 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
