Monday, April 04, 2011

DEPRESSED

Seriously, dear blog, i cant take it anymore. I don't know why i'm feeling this way but i am going to break down into several pieces yesterday which i cant control. No1 in this world will understand the feeling. It's like your mind is outta control and you're going crazy. KILLING and HURTING yourself to end the misery were all that was flashing through my mind. Am i going crazy or mad? What am i now? Am i still a human? I swear i could kill myself now if it wasn't for the thin line which holds me back dearly. Religion teachings. Suicide will leads to hell. I cant take it anymore. Please save me before i jump down from my block or i dash towards the car! Maybe burning myself seems like a better choice? Drugs? Or maybe i should go japan and help out and die there. I'm tired really. These years, the only time my heart is at rest is only so little. Nobody is able to see through me or maybe i want nobody to suffer the same fate as me. The darkness is too much. Even so, i will take every of it from the people i love. I hate myself cause i can no longer live on as a normal human... I'm as good as dying... Useless and pathetic till the end....

i know that i have loved you ... at 2:43 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities

` here.waiting ;

'watchin:you.go;

|YaNtEeN|

|S0phiA|

^reminds;me*of

Like how the sun is always there
Even when it has sunk down
It's a dream I can't let go
Fantasies starts to flow
Certainty is definitely here
I remain standing in the midst of parting way
And the shadow gently fades away
Flowers sway in the wind as if dancing
While remain completely buried by that kind smile
And echos along with that friendly voice
Because we're together, we're able to believe in each other
Still without remembering “sadness”, I begin to grasp “pain”
When these feelings reach you, they will change into “words”
The pulse that beats quickly catches my breath
Keep trying to break free for that blue, blue sky
Awaken from a dream in an unknown world ..

that'.last>note

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