if i never see your face again ...
then i will find you and love you once more
time after time

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

empty...

haiz..haiz...haiz...i duno wat to say...too much le baz...still haben find out hu dat person who gib me da present is...dotz...to tell u da truth..i feel so empty nwadays... duno why baz...msg mic..she nv reply..wat happened?! change hp or wat marx?! exam?! if nt den?! why suddenly lyk dat?! haiz..worry... yet sad...4get it...i nobody to her..so why shld i be sad...duno baz...so cold...haiz...ytd baz...sher cut hair i think..i saw...duno her lahz!! culdnt care more! she nt my who..haiz..den lyk copy joanna...den still say mic copy her or wat?! shit lorz! haiz... ken say she inmature! i agree! haiz...den say her tis..say her dat..i also agree... lyk veri true lehz! but though true..i dun wish him to insult her...haiz..duno baz...but i nv stop him..he wana say her wat wat wat...none of my concern...haiz...juz wana 4get her!!! haiz...duno lorz...den yt say cant walk wif me...i told her nvm..but actually.. i mind alot de lorz...nw reduce to my poor and lonely state again! haqiz...duno lahz...i alweis lyk dat...so juz remain lyk dat baz... but i walk wif dem..feelin diff...got ppl pei wo...feelin diff lorz... quite happi can say....but alweis alone..den lyk so...duno wat to say baz...haiz... nvm... she at da 1st place shldnt acc me de... also she my junior...haiz...den i told her duno wat shit... wifout u ppl betta...haiz...but...nvm baz...i came alone wifout anithing...nw at least i hav clothes...etc...happy le...loneliness!!! nvm! haiz....

i know that i have loved you ... at 10:02 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities

Thursday, May 12, 2005

my bday...

haiz....why..why why...dun even feel happy on my bday...duno lahz! still wonderin who is dat mystery peson dat gib me da present...nt sure lorz...haiz...cannt be ting le...cuz juz noe frm hui xian she go overseas lorz..so hu nehz? can it be mic?! or can it be sher?! or mayb i think too muc le baz...haiz....when sher wish mi a happy bday..i veri happy!! reali veri happy....nv expected dat...mi alreadi veri veri veri content le....but at da same time veri sad...haiz...lost her....lost da sun in my life...haiz....alweis havin darkness in my life...cuz i lyk black marx...so dark also nt bad...haiz...haiz....sher ish juz lyk da sun...but da sun nv raises le lorz.. haiz...mic ish juz lyk da moon baz..duno lahz...still lyk her...cant 4get her as i promised...i noe dat she dun lyk me le...i cannt yi xiang qing yuan...when on my bday..she nv wish me happy bday..i was veri upset..tot she had 4gotten all abt it le.. but ytd nite.. she sent me a msg...say wana be da last to wish me happy bday lorz....say nv 4get my bday..i was veri happy! veri content le... haiz...i noe ish wo dui bu qi ta zai xian..so i dun expect muc....haiz....but dat time i wana choose mic de...but....i noe she got daryl... how can i be lyk dat lorz..she lyk daryl lorz...wat can i do...also got lots of thingy..so i be wif sher...haiz..duno baz..... haiz!
hai zai mo mo de deng dai sher.....mic is cannt be de le..she lyk daryl alot..can see de..see her blog..alweis him..haiz...nvm.... mi onli her kor!! care so muc 4 wat sia...haiz...duno lahz...sher also dun lyk mi le i think....my sun n mood is gone....livin in complete darkness...but i never fear...cuz i noe somehwre inside i'll keep dem close to my heart...as long as i can feel myself...it doesnt matter if i can see in da dark or not..cuz love is blind..haiz...haiz...haiz................................................................................................

i know that i have loved you ... at 12:01 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities

Sunday, May 01, 2005

dun cut le..plz....

let me tok abt yt cuttin herself baz...feel so sad...why so silly go cut?! haiz...my heart aches....me as ur kor cant even take care of u...am i suitable to be ur kor?! u noe marx? dat time i disown ur sis ish cuz i reali feel so iseless...cant help her at all...i dun wana be lyk dat...i cant help her...at least i can help yt...haiz...but yet...haiz...ytd still make her angry and upset somemore!! AHHHH!! feelin so sucky! why shld i exist? tell me baz! can u? haiz...

nw...nt onli yt cut...sher also cut...ytd when meet her...saw it...i took her hand a take a look...haiz..why muz go cut.. heart veri pain...xin hao tong ni zhi dao marx? u noe marx?! why muz lyk dat?! why are u cuttin my heart?! alreadi shattered le...why muz u cut somemore?! u wan it to turn into powder marx?! haiz...ish dat wat u wan...haiz... reali veri hate myself! cant help yt..can stop u...wat else can i be usefu l4? haiz...

nxt ish mic baz...cut cut cut...veri happy zit? haiz...why muz u keep on cuttin my heart?! though u duno dat i still hav feelin 4 u...but u noe i care 4 u...so why muz u cut...heart veri pain...xin tong...dun cut le...plz...i cant take ani of these animore...haiz...cut illusion...haiz..duno lahz...haiz...its all my fault dat their frenship broken..haiz... hate it! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! i am a fuckin asshole! bastard! goin crazy! can anione plz tell me wat to do...haiz...left 91 to cut...haiz...day by day baz....
sadsadsad

i know that i have loved you ... at 5:23 pm
fate crumbled all around 0 identities

worry...

haiz...today get to noe sher goin 4 work...aft muc askin...haiz...finally find out le...makes me so upset when she didnt even tell me...didnt even discuss wif me or wat...haiz...but wat am i to her? why muz she tell me...haiz... duno baz...when i noe le...me so worry...wat abt her studies...wat abt tis...wat abt dat...den she workin alone lehz..at dwntown east de mac...at nitez quite dark lorz...den wat if sth happen to her?! haiz...den wat shld i do?! haiz...haiz... haiz...haiz...tell me...no one acc her u noe marx?! do u noe how upset and worry i am?! i duno dat kinda feeling...haiz...haiz...reali reali reali reali reali love her a lot a lot! haiz...juz hope she can be happy baz...haiz sher...can u plz dun leave me?! wo bu nen mei you ni....do u noe? do u understand?! so upset... nw more upset...haiz..cant open da disket u gav me...cant see da thingy u wrote inside 4 me...wat shld i do?! haiz...AHHH going mad le...haiz...i go water myself juz nw...haiz....haiz...reali goin crazy...insane...haiz...duno le me...confuse!

i know that i have loved you ... at 10:33 am
fate crumbled all around 0 identities

` here.waiting ;

    Kel
    Fateful 21
    Bellieving
    Waiting

'watchin:you.go;

^reminds;me*of

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Like how the sun is always there
Even when it has sunk down
It's a dream I can't let go
Fantasies starts to flow
Certainty is definitely here
I remain standing in the midst of parting way
And the shadow gently fades away

Flowers sway in the wind as if dancing
While remain completely buried by that kind smile
And echos along with that friendly voice
Because we're together, we're able to believe in each other

Still without remembering “sadness”, I begin to grasp “pain”
When these feelings reach you, they will change into “words”
The pulse that beats quickly catches my breath
Keep trying to break free for that blue, blue sky

Awaken from a dream in an unknown world ..


that'.last>note


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